Remember, Remember the Fifth of November

Remember, Remember the Fifth of November, the day that it all began.

A blog, I thought to myself, well that'd be an interesting life plan.

So I plotted, and searched looking for the right place for me,

Running into blogspot and flipping through their formats for free.

This could work, I said, already planning it all,

I could talk about work, about life, about foosball.

Hyjinks, shenanigans, awkward experiences too,

All in great detail and ready to view.

It started so simple, just one introduction post,

Soon after was when I found I was toast.

A year later I'm still here, posting almost every night,

About anything that gives me inspiration to write.

Now what? I ask myself, should I keep on going?

Then thinking, okay scratch that and make it knowing,

That my life without this blog would truly be lacking,

What else could I do at night that's so useful in tracking

My life occurrences much like a journal,

If a journal was something you shared with stalkers eternal.

So I'll still be here tomorrow, and the day after that too

And if you're still reading this then here is my cue,

A few of my favorite posts I'd like to re-share,

About work, about family about dating, yes I dared.

Read these or not it's been my pleasure to entertain,

Or overload you with random facts that stick in your brain.

Thank you for reading about a year in life of me,

Yes, this poem is almost over and I give you all for free,

A few of the highlights in this year-long journey,

Library adventures, family shenanigans and a pitch tourney.




1. Introductory Post: My Life in Closed Captions: *Insert Clever Title Here* "I have dyed my hair the following colors: red, blonde, purple, orange, blue, black and back to the original brown that we forgot it was."

2. A Christmas Tree Nightmare: My Life in Closed Captions: A Christmas Tree Nightmare "I put the trees up at the farmhouse today and gotta say wow. I've never wanted to burn something more in my life."

3. Onward, Gypsy Leader: My Life in Closed Captions: Well, at least the baby stopped crying... "What happens at the holiday party stays at the holiday party!"

4. Twelve Days of Christmas, Janice Dickinson Style My Life in Closed Captions: Christmas Came Indeed! "and a totally insufficient dowry..."

5. Sleep-Deprived Space Cadets My Life in Closed Captions: "Screw the fan, You want an E-Reader!" "Yes, I took out my rage against e-readers on this pen!"

6. Carbination 101 My Life in Closed Captions: Library + Science experiments = Hootie Hoo "It was disgusting but caffeinated."

7. Tell them you worship snakes My Life in Closed Captions: The girl with the captivating eyes + sick day + fi... It always works for me.

8. Shimmy Damnit, Shimmy! My Life in Closed Captions: Right about now, the funk soul brother. Check it o... "Give me a piece of that gum, you didn't tell me it would be enjoyable."

9. I hope you're wearing socks. My Life in Closed Captions: His Name Was GADE - Delayed...Reaction "Gade said no wonder, these shoes don't fit me so great."

10. I like cheese, but I don't like cheese. My Life in Closed Captions: New Shoes, the Cheese Speech, Warped Tour and MXPX... "It's ridiculous that it's this hard to walk like a normal person."

11. Don't put that in the blog! My Life in Closed Captions: Make the lambs stop screaming! "She's got the biggest bajoingas at this table."

12. Satan has a thing for redheads My Life in Closed Captions: "Those are gonna be some weirdass dreams..." "Are we gonna get in trouble?" "Just tell them you were the one waiving the flag."

13. Happy Birthday to me My Life in Closed Captions: "It sunk, we're over it!" haha, FACE!

14. I learned two things, 1. There are such things are Snow Leopards My Life in Closed Captions: We can be heroes just for one day... and 2. If I call Superwoman at 2AM she will retaliate.

15. Apparently, within the next few weeks, I'm going to find my mate. My Life in Closed Captions: Just you and me and my GUAAARRRDS! Oh, and the world is going to end.

16. I met a guy. I thought he was sane. My Life in Closed Captions: You're everything that everybody warned about... We went out. Turns out he's not.

17. The Dirt System My Life in Closed Captions: "Cause even after three text messages, four missed... So I have this doppelganger.

18. Mr. Rogers was an ordained minister. My Life in Closed Captions: Sitting, Waiting, Wishing on Red Wine, Mistakes, M... We've decided to think it's charming.

19. White Walls and Sterylized Equipment My Life in Closed Captions: This is a week of my favorite things Day Three: Te... "Yes, we'll flip you the bird."

20. You're too nice to the weird boys. My Life in Closed Captions: This Magnet Moment... Likes ass or jazz.

21. Barf Chips and Face Aerobics My Life in Closed Captions: Hello Koha! But I do own a bicycle.

22. The Surgery Group My Life in Closed Captions: Embark the vehicle! "I'm sorry creepers were taking pictures of your butt."

23. It's not a club. My Life in Closed Captions: I'm a pancake. I'm a pancake. Do you need me for this conversation?

24. You will not get a handout for your marriage. My Life in Closed Captions: So you'll remember what I forgot to say... Donkey Hotey.

25. If it falls apart just lie. My Life in Closed Captions: Can I Keep You - Some Assembly Required "Support a para-professional a year, pay your library fines!"

26. Take that "Creative Reasons" My Life in Closed Captions: *Spoiler Alert* I ain't sayin' I was wrong about any of these...

27. Well, we can't all come and go by bubble. My Life in Closed Captions: Oh, just wear the frock, it's pretty! I'm beautifully tragic.

28. You fell in love with a liar who will light you on fire. My Life in Closed Captions: Wickham, you mischievous man, You plotted a mischi... Move on to the neighbor Joanne.

29. Zombies vs. Unicorns My Life in Closed Captions: Impromptu speech-writing Edward vs. Jacob

30. Black! Gold! Black! Gold! My Life in Closed Captions: Yeah... still gonna call it Rosenblatt. + 0-6, 0-6... "That's why I don't know anything about babies, I ran after you!"

31. Jack the Pigeon My Life in Closed Captions: Welcome to Earth, third rock from the sun...pigeon... seriously?

32. Circle! Square! My Life in Closed Captions: Circles, Squares and Ugly Women, Oh My! "Damn, the place is going to the cops."

33. Jim passed a kidney stone through his parietal bone. My Life in Closed Captions: 2G's version of Oh Lord of Light "Why don't you have a verse?"

34. Put on some music, it'll make her look less crazy. My Life in Closed Captions: 10 points for Gryffindor! "I will murder you at my wedding. I'm not above that."

35. The Sideways Hat Theory My Life in Closed Captions: Camp J 2011 Highlights "and pbbt you was gone."

36. List of skits My Life in Closed Captions: I've never heard silence quite this loud. JANSEN!

37. I'll google it. My Life in Closed Captions: Our drinking team has a golfing problem "Because when I think of cheerleaders I think of the Golden Girls."

38. You're a bit of a blonde in a brunette's body. My Life in Closed Captions: Groove is in the Heart "Get your head out of your purse." "It smells nice in here!"


More to come tomorrow.