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Life at the library, adventures with friends and other hysterics...

Sunday, September 2, 2012

where nature rules and man fights back

As I worked all day yesterday I was not able to watch the Husker game. Mom loves me enough to hit record so I watched it when I got home.

We rocked it - T-Magic turned T-Mart is now Air Martinez. 

Who the heck did he train with this summer? He was great!

And who put what is Maher's cheerios? He missed like 2 fieldgoals total last year, this year he misses his first two attempts from like under 40?!?

Nebraska has a history with fantastic kickers, something's gotta change. 

Anyway, the offense had a great game, defense and special teams are gonna need some work. 

Immediately following I was out like a light so I did not post. 

Because of this you get a double-dose post-age of, you guessed it, Swamp People. 

Yes, I came home and was immediately swallowed into the north room and forced to watch Willie Nelson and Sheryl Crow honoring Johnny Cash before I could watch the Husker game.

Which meant I could put off the Swamp People for another day. 

Today. 

So here, since I missed yesterday you get not one but two posts about Swamp People. 

Consider it a play-by-play. 

Some images me be disturbing
Viewer discretion is advised

20th day of the season
Severe storms to the north means the water is 2 foot higher
High water changes the swamp dramatically
Gives access to inaccessible bayous

Oh it’s the night before day 20 with Blake and Austyn
Gators are more active at night
Only legal to hunt during the day
Area not fished this year, or maybe even a FEW years
Gators in this area are known to be massive
It’s called Dead end bayou?

Over to RJ and son Jay Paul
Sacred Houma grounds where only those with Houma blood can hunt
A moment of silence around a bonfire and a victory song. Seriously?
Oh gotta place your hand on the drum to ask the creator for protection
Jay Paul showing a serious face

Joe and and step-son Tommy
On Voodoo Bayou, a lot of boats go in but don’t come out
Hit a pipe – what a way to start
Cursed canal – creepy central looks like a boat graveyard

Troy with son Chase
Hunting in a special family place with his baby boy
Set 20 lines then double back
Gator bit the boat
It’s a feisty one
Tried to eat his boot
Commercial break
Choot him!
Got him.
See a Giant female, set the bait
“Dinner has been served”

Back to RJ and Jay Paul
Trying a different bait method
“Smart stick”
Ancestors didn’t have hooks
Uh oh, Jay Paul is questionable

Joe and tommy in Voodoo
“Creepy looking” Is that a technical term?
Uh oh, gator is back in the marsh, gonna have to pull him back in the water.
Joe is leaning over the side
800 pounds of deadly force on the other end, somehow he pulls it into water
Tommy shoots
Nice gator, big seven

Black and Austyn in Bayou Pigeon
Interesting name
Excited to make money
Why would you bring your dog gator hunting?
Uh oh, marsh in the way, high water so they push through
Line down, apparently it’s a good one.
They might have something there now
Oh they got something right there
Gives Austyn all he can handle
There’s a lot of “aw yeah”ing
Hold him austyn, hold him!
Really? You have to be stronger than the gator?
No idea that was true.
Blake shoots, 9 foot gator
Uh oh Austyn is starting to feel the pressure, apparently their coach wants bigger gators

Back to Troy and Chase
Honey hole, you’re smoking , Chase Michael, you’re smoking
More sentimental family talk
Huge swells ahead, oh they might have the giant one
Caught up in the boscoyo
Gator is pulling the boat
Troy uses all his strength
Choot ‘em Chase!
Bit the boat
That’s power dude
He’s pulling Troy over the side, shoot the gun
Yeah one hand it
Dramatic water splash
Yeah baby, they got a pile in there now
Uh oh, it’s not dead
He ain’t got no bullets
Good thing he can jump

RJ and Jay Paul
RJ with his native baseball cap and pony tail
Underwater camera
Who’s “smoking rope”
Now that’s a gator
First smart stick hooked an aggressive seven footer
“Bust him up”
He’s your father, why are you calling him brother?
Another line down 20 feet away
Broke the pole
“Beautiful gator”
He’s pretty? Really?
600 pounder

Ewwww a spider eating a lizard

Joe and Tommy
6 tags filled in voodoo bayou
Oh, never say you’re not afraid, that’s always when something goes wrong
Look another abandoned boat
And the wind is picking up
And their boat dies
See, I told you.
“C’mon nelly”
Really? Nelly?
No Joe, it doesn’t look good
Commercial break
Tommy fixes it
Well that was worth a 3 minute break

RJ and Jay Paul
More talk of ancestral baiting method
Had a feeling that his people were with him
17 Smart Sticks brought 15 gators
They need a bigger boat
Another line down
They got them a “hand burner”
So big RJ’s first grab won’t hold him

Back to Blake and Austyn
Austyn knows the clock is ticking
Time is a very serious matter in the alligator season
Gator puts up one hell of a fight
Dramatic water splash
This one will break their record
12 feet 4 inches
Longest of the season
Big one in the boat is money in the boat
Know it’ll help cement their reputation
They done a good job and done what they supposed to do

Troy and Chase
Don’t put your hand in the water, Chase!
Troy knows it’ll be aggressive so he takes the reigns
Now he’s in the crosshairs of a ferocious killer
Commercial break
Almost bit him
Certain it’s the monster from this morning
It’s a big one
Yes Chase he’s pissed off, you’re about to shoot him with a rifle
Pop him
One shot
Freaking monster dude
950 pounds
More sentimental family talk
He’ll “never forget that alligator”
Even more sentimental talk

Joe and Tommy
Struck gold in high water
Hit a log
Big ‘ol splash Tommy
Gator staring ‘em down
Holding his ground
Can’t hold, can’t hold, can’t hold
Why yes Joe, he is giving you a hard time
I don’t think he wants to get his butt over there
Tommy shoots
Dramatic water shot
Look at the size of those toes
Long bizarre trip

Big Al’s seafood restaurant to drop them off
RJ and Jay Paul caught 16 with their Smart Sticks
More sentimental ancestors talk
Stash of cash
End credits

AND AS IF YOU NEEDED MORE - really, it's only fair as I was forced to watch two episodes

Joe and tommy
Gator on land
Uh oh, Joe is forced to leave the safety of the boat
No idea where the gator is
Poke right there?
Really?
Is that so smart?
Get in the boat, Joe!
Tommy shoots and shoots and shoots, gator dives for the water
Tommy shoots again
I don’t think he wants to calm down
Make it a “sure shot” Tommy
Dramatic water splash
In a rush so they can go shrimping by lunch

Yay Liz! She’s my favorite
And her helper Kristi
Why does she put electrical tape on her fingers?
Kristi wrangles cattle for a second job
A gator got one of the cows
To get to the spot they’ll have to go by horseback
Liz: “What the hell?”
Isn’t so sure about the plan, I don’t blame you
His name is Dylan?
Hiya Dylan
She’s not scared of alligators but she’s scared of horses?
Don’t pull on the saddle

Junior and Malcom – man, where’s Willie, I like him
Just like Kristi Malcom works multiple jobs
He’s a catfisher
He caught a gator in a catfish net?
They’re eating his bait and get stuck
Uh oh, ripped the nets
$1200 of damage
Making a living in the swamp is hard so they help each other out
Infestation? An alligator infestation
Run into another random fisherman with broken nets
He can smell a gator from the boat?
Oh, gator’s on the land
Shoot him
No bullets in the gun?!
Hurry up and shoot the gator
Commercial break
“Rolled that sucker son”
Nice shooting, Tex
Tag #1
Line down
Splashed by the tail
Growling at them
Nice little gator
Pop him
That’s what you get for getting him wet
Tag 2
Found another one of his nets with a gator in it
The gator moved, aren’t they concerned that the gator is moving?

The Guist brothers, ah sad day since one of them died
Neighbor needs help fixing a boat motor
Gotta find parts to fix it
Check out a neighbor’s storage
You search that side he’ll search that side
How are you going to fix a motor if you don’t know what a carburetor looks like?
How does part heaven have everything but a carburetor?

Back to Joe and Tommy
Time isn’t on their side
“Time is a ticking clock”
Only 4 tags filled, need 6 more before they can go shrimping this afternoon
Line down
Another one on the land?
Whoa, Tommy misses again? I thought you said you were gonna put a cap in his – whoA! Got him
A welcome 7 footer

Liz and Kristi
Gator terrorizing cattle
Riding horses down the canal
Load your gun, he could be in the weeds
She don’t know what in the hell is in those bushes
Kristi Lou
Oh line down
Feels like a good one
Hanging off the dock, gonna pull her into the water
Giving her a fight
Commercial break
Shoots and scores
Uh oh, not the one they were looking for
Look! He’s right there! But they can’t shoot cause they couldn’t get him, they’re on horses
Get some bait juice
Koolaide?
Ew the scent of beef blood

Guist brothers
Heard about an old motor up the road
They don’t speak French but the seller don’t speak English
Oh yeah, try making motor noises
Spell it out in the dust, nice

Joe and tommy
Gators moving
Get the magnum tommy
See Joe’s smart cause he wears gloves to hold onto the line, no one else does
Dramatic water splash
1 tag away from the start in their shrimping season
Oh, found one in open water
Tommy’s only gonna get one shot
Quit moving
Hit him from a distance
Impressive
He fights in the swamps every day for his kid
Ready to start shrimping

Junior and Malcom
Wreaking havoc on his nets and his paycheck
YES! Second boat with Willie in it!
Willie and Randy start the tag team to clean out the area
Found a big one in open water, pulls out the rifle
The gun’s off, he misses
Got him, pulls out the treble hook
OH! Not dead.
Get the gun
Ohhhhhh, it escapes
Willie throws the treble hook where he sees bubbles
Gator can hold his breath for over an hour
Got him
Randy can’t see
Holy crap Willie grabbed his head, pulled him out of the water so Randy could shoot it

Back to Joe and Tommy
Pulling double duty
Alligators in the morning, shrimp in the afternoon
14 foot nets
Weighted at the bottom they drive straight and it strains the river
Boat named Mandy Lynn

Guist brothers fixing the motor
How long do you think it’s gonna take
An hour? Maybe
15 minutes? Maybe
Wow, makes you trust their fixing abilities
Mitchell fixes while Glenn sits and watches
Holy crap they fixed it
“Oh ye-yah”

Junior’s armada
Got 20, off to the buyer
…or not.
One in plain sight, Junior throws the treble hook
Oh my god, Malcom grabbed his tail and pulled him up
These people are stupid!
It worked, but still!

Back to Liz and Kristi
On the dock, checking their bait
Line is tight
Liz takes aim
CRAB!
Aw, throw him back
Oh, down the canal another line is down
Bubbles
Could outweigh Kristi by 600 pounds
No traction, gonna pull Kristi in!
Commercial break
Liz takes aim
Kristi struggles
Liz needs to act fast
Pop him!
Kristi’s like a foot from water
Got him!
800 pound beast, how fat do you think Kristi is?
Hahahahahaha, he’s too big to pull out.
Kristi gets the horse, ties the rope around the gator, and pulls him out
Dragging him to the truck, that’s nice
Yeehaw

Joe and tommy shrimping for the first day this season
Whoa 100 pounds of shrimp
Joe does the “shrimp shuffle”
“Important to work hard at it right away”

Oh god, Willie and Randy are catching frogs in the dark
Bigass headlights on their hats
In Louisiana frogs are a delicacy
Three bucks a pop
Wow
Beautiful frog?
Ewww, my mouth is not watering I don’t know what you’re talking about
Froggin’

Junior’s brain “don’t ever stop”
Dip-netting for catfish
Another headlamp
That’s nice
Even more sentimental family crap


aaannd that's it. 

Now I shall sleep. 




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