How to describe the past 60 hours. Wait, how long ago was 3PM Thursday? I'm bad at math. I think it's around 60. Or maybe not, I'm too tired to count. Okay, how to describe approximately the past 60 hours...
I met a guy. I thought he was sane. We went out. And it turns out he's not. Actually he is. I think. Maybe it's me that's crazy. But since when does playing darts at a bar suddenly put you in a serious relationship? I'm still totally lost. I met him at 3. He asked me out at 4. My coworkers said don't do it, he's bad news bears at 5. We met up at 6. He started referring to himself as my boyfriend at like 9. Seriously?
We hung out and all that then he calls me like all day Friday even though I was at work so I couldn't answer and totally freaked out on me when I spent my night doing homework instead of seeing him again. But it was due at midnight! So then he wanted to hang out today but I already had plans aka class and going to the farm. Then stuff happened with him so he called me like 30 times before 10AM. I'm just still totally confused. Anyway, everyone I've talked to says to run for the hills and don't be nice about it. Which is really hard for me because I'm kind of a nice person. Well, not according to the BFF, she knows the real cynical and sarcastic me. But anyway, he's a nice guy and just because he has a past doesn't mean that it's going to like...I don't know where I'm going with this.
Anyway, the point is I'm single again. Or trying to be. But I don't think it's working. Cause I'm ending it over the phone. (I've known him like 60 hours, am I actually required to do this live? I was never good at that either.) The second sister won't let me see him anymore. I'm actually kind of fond of her "Intercom Breakup" theory. Like if he mysteriously shows up at your door you just do it over the intercom instead of letting him in. I think it could soon be all the rage - like the next major breakup trend.
Back to the whole phone thing, yeah, all we do is argue. He questions me about everything I say. We have nothing in common. We're kinda polar opposites actually. Scratch that, we are polar opposites and my family wouldn't approve. So no, my mother doesn't know, and no you can't tell her.
So I told him that all we do is argue and we don't have anything in common and my family wouldn't approve and that all these things are important to me so we couldn't work because we weren't working and yeah, guess what. We argued. More. So I hung up cause I was tired of it. He called 8 times before I could turn my phone off.
Apparently I'm it for him and he's like ready to settle down and ugh he said all this cheesy crap about how he was waiting for the right person and that all the waiting was worth it because he met me or something like that. It made me want to vomit. Literally. He makes me sick. Maybe I should tell him that next time he calls. But no, all the stress and frustration is literally making me sick. And giving my friends/family/coworkers anxiety. Monday is gonna be fun. Because I met him at work. And he knows I'll be there. Ugh. Guard!
And no, I'm not forgetting about the religious fortune teller's prediction about me finding my mate in the next few weeks - and neither are my coworkers. I'm taking a lot of crap for this. Taking a step back it is kind of amusing. Cabin Fever is going back to the "tell him you worship snakes" theory mentioned here My Life in Closed Captions: The girl with the captivating eyes + sick day + fi... Which basically scares away telemarketers, religious fanatics and creepy looking stalkers. I'm hoping.
Irony about reposting that link is that I've had quotes from Gilmore Girls floating around in my head since I met him and also that was about my first class and today was my last class. Which was good by the way. Kinda sad actually, I was just starting to get to know those people. And I was very TA today which was funny. The Prof had to kind of leave early so I helped out with evaluations and all that. I'll post the Goddess-isms tomorrow when I have my notebook.
"Like stop eating the paste kind of special?" The Gilmore Girls thing lately was about Paris going on a date. I actually love Paris's character. Now. In the beginning she was kind of a B word. I'm starting to censor myself again as camp is coming up soon, not to mention I work in a library filled with children. Anyway, she goes on this date with this guy named Jamie and people are like shocked. Which is kind of like me. Cause I don't really have time to date anymore. Cause I'm a workaholic. I love my work and I love my job and I love my coworkers. Plus camp is coming up, plus we're having play practice all the time, plus there's been family stuff, plus plus plus...blah. Anyway, I don't really date. Not that I've really dated dated since like college. And I don't think that counted. Which is more of a long story. What was I talking about? PARIS! Right, anyway, sorry it's past midnight I get rambly. Shutup Amber, I know you're thinking she's like this no matter the time.
Anyway, Paris has this line -
"I can instantly deduce that when someone hears the name 'Paris' in the same sentence with the word 'date,' jaws will drop, confused looks will cover faces, words like 'how' and 'why' and 'Quick, Bob, get the children in the minivan because the world is obviously coming to an end.' will immediately fly out of people's mouths."
Very similar to me. And it's just so nice because it ties back to the whole fortune teller thing with the end of the world. But that's just one of my many favorite quotes from that episode.
Now I'm feeling more like:
Paris: What if I fall for him but he doesn't like me?
Rory: You'll find someone else.
Paris: What if there is no one else?
Rory: Then you'll get some cats.
But I'm not falling. I've found it's physically impossible to fall for someone when you're still hung up on your ex.
Song for the past few days:
Lily Allen's "Knock 'em Out" one of my favorites, although all of hers are fantastic.
"Try desperately to think of the politest way to say - uhhhh..."
Another fun quote from that episode -
Paris: Get in the closet.
Rory: What? You're crazy.
Paris: If there's no one to compare me to, I might have a fighting chance.
Rory: When we get home, get a new therapist because the one you have isn't working.
Okay, that was a lot. But I have been gone for a while. Tomorrow means long day, but it'll be relaxing. So I guess it's not really long. Why do people say long day when every day is the same length? I'm gonna go to sleep now before I turn even more philosophical over cliches. That happens a lot when I'm half asleep. Also, words like "fork" "spoon" and "Doug" seem a lot funnier past 2AM.
I'm gonna go now. More tomorrow. Or later today. Yeah. Out.
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