So I posted it on Squirt's wall cause she likes accents.
Coolest Aunt, 15 years running.
Just saying.
PS - She got her Learner's permit the other day, makes me feel SUPER old.
Wordie says he's gonna put foam all around his car just in case.
Stay off the sidewalks people.
I told her not to take driving lessons from her uncle.
He gave me my first driving lesson.
Here's how that went.
Ready?
"I just did three illegal things, what were they?"
Speeding.
Changed lanes in an intersection.
Did it without signaling.
I have a lot of weird early driving memories.
Second Sister parked her car in the ditch once - she and Favorite Sister-In-Law had a place in town - and Mom was coming so she wanted to convince Mom it was my doing.
Then there was my brother-in-law - the King of Useless Knowledge - letting me drive a car for the first time.
aka putting it in neutral and letting it roll like 3 feet in a driveway, it was AWESOME!
Hitting a deer with Smo and Shel in the car. With cappuccino. Yeah, those went everywhere. Best part we were like 1 mile from home. Called Dad, "does it run?" "yeah." "drive it home." To be fair it was like 10PM.
Driving over a hill with an ex and the yoyo in the cupholder flipping over and landing in place.
Dirt road in the rain, slid off that one with same ex and friend Jess.
Getting pickup stuck in mud at brother's place whilst attempting to go swim in his pond with friends.
...
I'm sensing a trend.
...
Perhaps these incidents were not my fault, there's always people involved.
Been in 3 accidents - none of them my fault.
Once on the farm, got hit by some dude my age who had - the month previously - put the same car in the ditch (in a giant snowpile) about half a block from where he hit me. My brother pulled him out. He suggested we not call the cops, because apparently, not only was he just in that ditch a month before but he also hit his friend's car not long before that and it was a cheap fix. After convincing him that I was calling my parents - well, my brother - he decided then was a good time to tell me his life story. Apparently he had a kid. Guess how he found out. "Merry Christmas, I'm pregnant."
That text came after they had broken up.
Meanwhile in my head I'm screaming, "where the hell is my brother?" If he were at home he could have been there in 30 seconds but instead he was in town with my mother so it took 10 minutes.
While that may sound like a super fast response time, it really doesn't feel that way when you're hearing someone's life story.
Cops showed up, gave him a ticket and he paid for the damage.
Accident number 2 was here, way north on 27th, got rear-ended by a guy named Kory.
Yes, he spelled it with a K.
Think his number is still in my phone.
Anyway, it was barely a scratch, more of a shock factor than anything else. I told him I'd have my brother-in-law look at it and then contact him.
3rd one Mom was driving. We were driving through Oldest Sister's neighborhood on ice, dude coming in opposite direction was going too fast, couldn't slow down, ended up spinning and hitting us.
Got to call the non-emergency number.
Again.
Good thing I work where I work.
Otherwise it would have been 911, emergency.
You learn so much from working at a library filled with crazies, drunks, and other festive personalities.
He was like half a block from his house, sad day for him.
Mom's car sat in my parking lot for a while 'til it could get checked out.
It snowed and someone made a smiley face on the hood.
Oh the joys.
But none of them were my fault. Much more cautious now with the new car.
I used to speed, a lot. Now I don't really see the point - not that I did then, it was just something you did when you're a teenager and stupid.
But now I have to watch out for freakin' cops who hide in alleys, then walk in the middle of the road pointing their speed gun at you and then point to a sidestreet you're supposed to turn off on.
Or the joy and excitement that was my birthday last year when I got pulled over in Second Sister's driveway. "Happy birthday, here's a warning." That was an adventure. But the speeding wasn't intentional, thought it was 35 when it was in fact 25.
No, I actually don't speed now cause I have to pay for the insurance, ha! And as much fun as Stop Class is - been there twice - I can really do without another 8 hours of "don't speed" "wear your seatbelt" "don't drink and drive" "don't text and drive" etc. etc. Although, the more recent one was more like watch these amusing video clips because the cop who's supposed to be here is sick.
How did I get here?
Oh right, Squirt and her driving capabilities.
They need to take her out to the farm and let her loose.
I never took Driver's Ed. I actually got my license when I was 14, or was it 13?
Cause you get your school permit at like 15 but then I could get it when I was 14 cause I lived more than 10 miles away from school and then instead it was 13 cause I lived on a farm too or some weird law thing.
I don't remember.
I was supposed to do like 50 hours of supervised driving but I'm pretty sure the parentals just signed at the bottom and called it good.
Speaking of signing, apparently the Library Goddess has perfected my signature. Good thing she knows how to spell my name. Ask her about that later.
And as for the parentals, today is Mom's birthday. I called, yay me.
And also Abby Cadabra's birthday. I called, yay me.
I asked her if she wanted me to sing and she replied, with absolutely no excitement whatsoever, "sure". No faith in my birthday-singing skills. So I sang anyway.
It was amusing, we - as siblings - banter frequently.
So this morning I get this text from my brother saying:
"Don't forget today is Mom's birthday. As I have already given her the continuous gift of having a child with her birthday no call is necessary. You less thoughtful children must call."
To which Oldest Sister replied:
"U r taller than ur hair." (We give him crap cause he shaved his head in college and the hair never grew back.)
And then Second Sister added:
"I don't claim to be the most thoughtful offspring, that much is certain. Just the best looking."
I WAS WORKING so being the responsible adult that I am, refused to participate. (actually I didn't get them until lunch and by then we had moved on to talk of burning farm ground so we can start from scratch. on purpose don't worry.)
Apparently the only skills needed to participate are being able to beat stuff with a stick with a mud flap on it.
And there must be beer on hand.
No, we're not redneck whatsoever.
I missed out on last time so I'm hoping to make it this year. Last year it was just the boys. Driving 4 wheelers around the fires.
Taking a break from their day jobs.
No, we're not idiots whatsoever either.
but that's enough family hijinks...
is it hijinks or hyjinks?
either way i'm getting those annoying red edit lines.
Got to see 2 of my favorite home branch friends today as they made an appearance at the work branch. Does that mean I can call them my "homies" cause they're from the home branch? or would that make them the "home branchies"?
I like "homies" better. Congratulations.
Didn't get to talk to Joe Studley for very long but it was good to catch up with Sensei as I haven't seen her since working at the home branch on a regular basis, cause she used to come in and check stuff out even after she retired. So that's what like November of last year, not like this past one though, the year before that.
Really?
Has it been that long?
Geez.
But I guess yeah, cause I started May 2010.
Alright, on to the music before I find something else to ramble about.
Up to the last of Maroon 5's greatest hits, so take like 11?
Heard the first one live, would have loved if they sang Doin' Dirt, that's one of my favorites.
Love Somebody
amateur music video, but cute.
Tickets
catchy.
Doin' Dirt
love it.
Beautiful Goodbye
fitting end.
Aaannd I just realized that I don't work tomorrow.
So I don't have to go to bed immediately, whoa.
All day yesterday it felt like Thursday. Now that it is Thursday I don't feel like I'm off tomorrow.
Weirdness.
Oh well, taking advantage. Will sleep in, do some homework, watch some movies and hopefully see the boyfriend at some point.
Oh, and Carter and I made snowpeople.
The one on the left is Norman. Haven't decided on a name for his friend yet.
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